Перевод песни Stu Stone – Crooked Stick

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Uhh. dis one is for KISS FM
No cursin. no swears.
Dis dis one's for the kids
The other day I read a letter said ah-Mr. Kennedy
«How you be?» Oh good «Well fine — this is your record company»
«We really love what you've done so far with your rap CD»
«And we love all of the support that you get from MTV»
«But do you think that you could maybe make a song like Black Eyed Peas»
«With a little bit of White Stripes and Mike Jones»
«It could be a big big big ringtone» Stidone! (Yo)
Better get started quick, better think of somethin sick
Okay, I can sing about my... stick (okay) okay
Hmm, uhh
I GOT A STICK~! I swing it to the left
I GOT A STICK~! Together we're the best
MY CROOKED STICK~! Just touch it'll grow
OH NO! (OH NO~!) Oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh!
I was born with a crooked stick (I was born with a crooked stick)
I got a crooked stick
I speak loud and carry a big stick
I'm proud, and if you need it then baby I come quick
My stick (my stick) my stick, goes everywhere with me
My stick (my stick) my stick, can poke a cat out of a tree
My stick (my stick) so sick (so sick) it's ridiculous
My stick, it won't complain, it won't bitch or fuss
Oops — did I just say a bad word, really hope they censor it
If not (if not) the plan, let's hold hands, while I repent for it
My stick (my stick)
I was born with a crooked stick (I was born with a crooked stick)
I got a crooked stick
Heh, yo, you know what it look like (what it look like)
You know what it look like (I know what it look like)
Yeah, tell 'em
Stick look like a banana, B-A-N-A-N-A
Oh my (my stick) my stick (it be) it be the very best (oh yes)
You know my compass always point you to the the Northwest (I said)
Oh my (y stick) my stick (it be) it be the very best (oh yes)
You know my compass always point you to the the Northwest (I said)
. Uhh, uh J
What?
. We don't need it a third time
CRAP